The Artists for Arlo benefit concert in Giants Stadium was a huge success, albeit hastily put together. Joe didn't like CSN's set, of coruse, although the old hippies liked it. Dylan was great, the kids liked J-Lo, and Bruce brought the house down, and the cash rolled in. The crowd went crazy when Bruce delivered the following encore performance.
__________________

The screen door slams
Mary's dress waves
Like a vision she dances across the porch
As the radio plays
Roy Orbison singing for the lonely
Hey that's me and I want you only
Don't turn me home again
I just can't face myself alone again
Don't run back inside
darling you know just what I'm here for
So you're scared and you're thinking
That maybe we ain't that young anymore
Show a little faith, there's magic in the night
You ain't a beauty, but hey you're alright
Oh and that's alright with me

You can hide 'neath your covers
And study your pain
Make crosses from your lovers
Throw roses in the rain
Waste your summer praying in vain
For a savior to rise from these streets
Well now I'm no hero
That's understood
All the redemption I can offer, girl
Is beneath this dirty hood
With a chance to make it good somehow
Hey what else can we do now
Except roll down the window
And let the wind blow back your hair
Well the night's busting open
These two lanes will take us anywhere
We got one last chance to make it real
To trade in these wings on some wheels
Climb in back
Heaven's waiting on down the tracks
Oh oh come take my hand
Riding out tonight to case the promised land
Oh oh Blunder Road, oh Blunder Road
oh Blunder Road
Lying out there like a killer in the sun
Hey I know it's late we can make it if we run
Oh Blunder Road, sit tight take hold
Blunder Road

Well I got this guitar
And I learned how to make it talk
And my car's out back
If you're ready to take that long walk
From your front porch to my front seat
The door's open but the ride it ain't free
And I know you're lonely
For words that I ain't spoken
But tonight we'll be free
All the promises'll be broken
There were ghosts in the eyes
Of all the boys you sent away
They haunt this dusty beach road
In the skeleton frames of burned out Chevrolets

They scream your name at night in the street
Your graduation gown lies in rags at their feet
And in the lonely cool before dawn
You hear their engines roaring on
But when you get to the porch they're gone
On the wind, so Mary climb in
It's a town full of losers
And I'm pulling out of here to win.

See,I knew you guys could do it!! UH OH.....

The next step for Joe, of course, was to get more time off work. The morning after the Artists for Arlo concert, Joe went to see the office manager at work.

"So," said the office manager, "you need more time off. You just went to Massachusetts, then Mayberry, then D.C., and missed weeks of work, and now you gotta go to Australia to bail out this Arlo guy again. If he's as famous as you say, he'd have his own security staff. Your desk has work piled to the ceiling."

"Honest," said Joe, "I gotta go."

"First I gotta talk this over with the boss."

"The Boss already said it was OK."

"You already talked to him about this?"

"Hell, yeah, I talked to The Boss last night."

"Then I won't stand in your way."

Joe got the heck out of there before the office manager figured out that The Boss was Bruce Springsteen.

With all the formulating and watching Rebel ride at the Olympics,(magnificent Dressage test and cross country leg, only showjumping leg to go!!)Louise had slept through the alarm, was nearly late for work, but cheered up when Joe called and said how well the concert went and that the rescuers,friends and helpers could afford two more Blundercopters and were headin down to OZ soon for the THIRD big rescue. "Would you believe what my manager said?" said Joe.And he proceeded to tell Louise about what the manager had said and all about Arlo and security gaurds,"Everyone knows Arlo is real famous but doesn't rip off his fans by chargin' the earth for tickets!!".
"Thats the difference between folkies and corperate types" said Loiuse (see how tired I am ,can't even spell my own name).
Joe told Louise to go get some dam sleep "And no formulating at 3 in the morning!!" he reminded her.
So they said good bye and looked forward to the big rescue (again)......

The Boss was getting a bit tired of Joe changing his song lyrics and using him as an excuse to cut work. Being a New Jersey guy, he decided to take matters into his own hands and called Larry, another Jersey guy and said "Larry, how ya doin'? You kinda know this Joe guy, doncha Lar? Do you think I should have Tony Soprano handle him, or just make him sleep with the governor" . "Both" replied Larry

Joe sure was glad to hightail it outa the country after what Larry had said to the BOSS. He even let Larry come on the rescue, because all the Blunderites knew he had some pretty amazing rescuing skills and all.
So they headed west in the Blunderchoppers, flyin' over Oregon to wave to Louise's kin, then lit out over the Pacific and down to OZ. Louise had had a real good sleep by the time they got to her house, so they lowered the ladder off BLUNDERFORCE ONE and headed for Canberra to rescue (again) the Folksinger,(who they knew, through an insider at "The Lodge", had been transfered to Parliament House).
THe copters were disquised once more so nobody took much notice. "This place looks like a bunker" said Star, "how are we ever gonna get in there! Well somebody was hummin' Alice's (there's always one!) and that gave the Blunderites an idea!!
The gals hung back and let the guys go in alone, (that was real hard for the gals since they were the generation that had fought long and hard for their place at the table and all).
The guys tried to look real mean and ornery and when the security gaurds saw them enter the building one of 'em looked a bit worried. "Hey Darryn" said Darrell,"Those guys look kinda scary". "Awe, their just a bunch a ol' Hippies!!" said Darryn. Darrell felt braver now and yelled out "Why don't you go get a dam haircut!!"
The guys swaggersd up to the two D's tryin' to put on their meanest, orneriest looks. Joe walked up to Darryn and said,"You seen a guy with long white hair and beautiful green eyes?" "Yeah" said Darryn, "But i'm not tellin' YOU where he is!!!
Larry narrowed his eyes and said "Kids, you know who Arlo Guthrie is!!" "Arlo who?" said Darrell. "You know" said Larry, "Woody's boy"! "Woody who?" said Darryn.
"Ain't you ever seen a movie called "Alices Resturant?" said Levi, with dis-belief on his face. "O yeah" said Darrell, "Mum and Dad get that out some times when they want to relive their youth, and I just shake my head". "Well" said Levi,remember those guys Arlo hung out with on the Group W Bench"!
"YYYYEESSS" said Darrell, with a worried look on his face, "Well thats us!!!" said Levi, "and Arlo's a good pal of ours seein' as he showed how we could be sharin, friendly people and all in his movie!!"
The two D's turned kinda pale, especially when all the gals came stormin'in screamn" "Take us to our leader,or else!!"
Course this had been hard for the Blunderites, beein' as they were Pacifists and all and did't believe in pre-emptive strikes or any kinda violence.
The two D's had gone kinda pale and agreed to take the Blunderites down to the bowels of The House where they found Arlo sittin' around with all kindsa subversive Aussies drinkin' Fosters and eatin' Lamingtons and Vegemite sandwiches and havin' a good ole time......

Now that they had found Arlo, the problem of course became how to get him out of the bowels of the building to safety. The Blunderites couldn't remember the way out, and the rebel Aussies were so full of Fosters, they didn't even know where they were to begin with. "Hey, Arlo," said Levi, "do you know the way out of this place?" And at that, the folksinger pulled out what looked like a roll of toilet paper that he had purloined from The Lodge (remember the maid?) and slowly began to unwind it, from the bottom, of course. "This here map that I craftily made on the way down here should get us out," Arlo said. "The only thing is that I want these Aussie fellas to come with us, 'cause they know where all the good spots are in town, and they've got all the Fosters with them." With that,......

One of the guards from Oz did volunteer the following advice" Arlo, after we ate all that vegemite and drank all that Fosters, you may want to save some of that toilet paper for something other than the escape and map reading". Joe remarked that "vegemite" sounded like some kind of explosive, Larry remarked that "vegemite" sounded to him like some kinda of vegetarian termite, and of course Levi reminded Larry that all termites are vegetarians and they all looked at each other, shrugged their collective shoulders and moved on with the escape.........guards in tow.

Well Louise was real proud of Arlo for eatin' Vegemite cos usually if a person hasn't grown up on it they HATE it.Even though Louise grew up in Portland Ore.('til she was 10),her Australian Nana had sent the family a BIG jar every Christmas, bein' as her Mom had grown up in OZ and had grown up on Vegemite and missed it alot.They had tried to sell it in the U.S.of A. once but NOBODY bought it! So Louise proceeded to tell all the friends about vegemite and how it's a yeast extract, thick and black, very salty and good on toast (but only if you grew up on it). Then she proceeded to sing the Vegemite Song about how it puts a "Rose in every Cheek" and all,then started singin' that other song that had stuck in her brain
sing her childhood in Oregon... "Little girls have pretty curls and I like Oreos....
(See what those advertisers to to kids brains?)
Joe looked at Louise,"Have you been smokin' something?".................

"But it REALLY is GOOD for you" said Louise. It contains Vegetable protein, yeast extracts,sugar, salt, added vitamins,herb and spice exracts and some other stuff and it was so popular that some other people put out two more versions called Promite and Marmite.And kids that eat a lot of it are called VEGEMITES. "We're happy little VEGEMITES as bright as bright can be!".. Joe and Levi looked at each other and shook their heads. "I think we better get her outta here as soon as possible, the lack of air must be affecting her brain!!" "Well with the luck we're havin' with Arlo's map we might need to call on some of those little Vegemites to help us get outta this darn place!!!" said Larry in exasperation.....

And, of course, the trouble with Arlo's map was that it had become a valuable commodity for all those who had been partaking of the Vegamite and the Fosters, just as the Aussie guard had figured. How to get all these people out of the bowels of the building without the map had now become a real predicament. "I've got an idea, mates," piped up that same Aussie guard who had proved so prescient about Arlo's map, "let's call Washington on the hot-line and talk to someone there. They've got lots of people sitting around with their heads up their bowels, so they'll know what to do about this." And so the call went out on the special line dedicated to conversations between international capitols all over the world.

The guards managed to get Arlo & the Blunderites out of the building. Before they could board the Blundercopters and head home, however, the beer and vegemite really began to take effect, and the Blunderites and the guards scattered into the jungle to relieve themselves, the men in one area and the women in another. All except Joe, who didn't drink beer, being as mystified about the popularity of beer as he was about that of Crosby, Stills, & Nash.

Joe stood waiting, thinking that vegemite reminded him of the I Love Lucy episode where she was peddling Vitameatavegiman, when two kangaroos hopped up to him and stood on either side of him. Joe knew nothing about kangaroos and decided to stand still and not bother them.

One of the kangaroos said to Joe out of the side of his mouth, "Do you pick your nose in Hoboken?"

"HUH???" said Joe. No, it couldn't be, he thought, that a kangaroo would talk.

After a minute the other kangaroo said, "Well? DO you pick your nose in Hoboken?"

Levi emerged from behind a bush and walked toward Joe, who suddenly told him, "These kangaroos are talking to me!!"

Levi looked at Joe strangely, then at the kangaroos, who silently looked back at Levi as though they were deer caught in the headlights.

"Yeah, right! We gotta get outta this place, if it's the last thing we ever do."

"I'm serious!" said Joe. "They keep asking if I pick my nose in Hoboken!"

The kangaroos just stood there.

Levi grabbed Joe by the arm and led him to the Blundercopters. Soon the other Blunderites emerged from the woods and followed.

When they were a good distance from the kangaroos, the one who spoke first reached into its pouch and withdrew a walkie talkie, turned it on, and put it to its mouth....

Of course he was callin' Little Johnnie who was waiting to hear if the spies (disquised as Kangaroos)had found out where those DAM HIPPIES! were headed.He yelled, "I've got Dick on the red phone from the White House demanding the return of The Folksinger! All hells done broke loose out side The House! Dick says there's all kindsa people with placards,they got long hair,short hair,suits,jeans,pearls, beads,and some of them even wearing badges sayin' "I used to be a Republican". And they got these signs sayin' "Mike for President!" , "No more DAM LIES" and stuff.
He wants that Folksinger back here pronto! He's gonna force him to pacify the MOB!"
Now did they think that "the people" were stupid enough to fall for anymore Trickie Dickie Stuff!! Well they got a BIG SURPRISE commin!!!
Meanwhile back on the Blundercopters everyone was feelin'a little peckish (hungry)so Terrie got a big basket out and yelled "Where have all the Brownies gone!!!! Of course everyone looked at Joe! what with all that talk about talkin' Kangas and all. "I didn't touch 'em!" replied Joe. Giggleing could be heard from under a seat. "See, said Joe, She wasn't smokin' anything, she was eatin' Brownies!!"
The choppers circled back above the Roos and were seen talking on the Walkie Talkie."Let's gettum!!"cried Agnes, "They might have valuable info!!" That Dynamic Duo, Ceashel and Cliffite leapt out of the Chopper and tackled the Roos to the ground........

...and right behind 'em, four gorgeous women jumped out of the copter, brandishing guitars and fiddles and other implements, and one BIGGGG bass with cowgirl stickers pasted all over it. In no time at all, the Roos realized their ruse was up and they'd have to talk. But not yet. Baldwinville gasped, "The Chicks ... but not the Dixie Chicks, exactly! Shelley, what have you done with Natalie Maines? However provoked, tell me you didn't drop her in the Pacific!!??" Emily Erwin stroked his head, saying, "No, no, she's fine. Natalie's leading the mob outside the White House. She's got the biggest, loudest mouth, so she's our diversion. While they're all hot and bothered over what Natalie might say about Dub-yah THIS time, we're here to turn this conspiracy into a movement! The minute we heard the code--when Blunder Road was sung at the Artists for Arlo concert--we knew the long-awaited time had come, as was foretold in Alice's Restaurant. Remember Alice's? Cliffite got Laura Lynch's old bass out of his shop and rounded us up: the real, true, original, acoustic Dixie Chicks: Laura, Robin, Emily, and Marty. We're here 'cause the Artists for Arlo concert was only the first step of a movement. We're starting right here, at Blunder Road in Brisbane. After Australia, we'll go "All Over the World" ... all the artists, all the people; we'll all sing a bar ..."

"A bar?" Larry cried..."Where's a bar?" Louise giggled, said, "Follow me!" then threw off her trench coat and belly-danced up Blunder Road. Joe croaked, "Does that bar have milk? I really, really need to get some milk!" John and Reg followed, singing "Wyldflower of the Berkshires," though they didn't know the words yet. And Arlo...remember Arlo? ...

Arlo leaped out of the chopper and yelled. "I've just been to Mike's website!!! We gotta get to New York by the 29th for the "United for Peace" protest rally!!! Ceashel! go catch Louise and don't let her touch any dam signs!!! Star, go get Joe and Larry outta the darn Milk Bar!!" (OZ for small shop that makes milkshakes, burgers, fish and chips, the old fashioned way!)