"THAT's MY BUSH" what a wonderfull news program, it takes one right into the White House to see how George and Laura handle their day to day affairs and even allows us to view the sex lives of our first family....


When Geo was running for office he said he would leave no child behind and he has indeed made sure a car is allways ready to pick up one of his kids from the local jail, now that's family values even I understand.

**Flatulence in the News** or **Back Away from the Beans**

Scotland Yard was called to investigate a citizen complaint against a police officer who purposely broke wind while investigating a crime scene at her home (Chingford, Essex, England; June), but in Werribee, Australia, in June, a misdemeanor convict was fined about $100 (U.S.) for purposely breaking wind inside a police station. And Drew Shintani, 35, was charged with stabbing a 30-year-old co-worker because he was tired of the co-worker's laughing at Shintani's flatulence problem (Hilo, Hawaii; April). And two men (aged 49 and 64) were arrested at a ShopRite store for harassing customers with cans of an aerosol spray that sounded and smelled like someone breaking wind (Washington Township, N.J., May). [Guardian, 6-7-01] [Melbourne Herald-Sun- Bloomberg, 6-7-01] [Hawaii Tribune-Herald (Hilo), 4-25-01] [Associated Press, 5-30-01]

To use an old '60's expression, those stories are a gas!

Sorry. I'm done farting around.

What a gas!

Are you guys trying to turn this wonderful newspaper that I am so proud of into a tabloid?!?!

There are alway yellow journalists who'll blow a lot of hot air to appeal to the public. Take the reins and and some di-gels and put this rag back on track, Larry!

Special Notice:

Our Wonderful Wizard (and what a wonderful wizard he is, he is) will soon be offering smell-o-rama here at ArloNet, please be sure to e-mail Larry for details.

yo, yo Nathen, come help me out, on the controversial thread, ok?
some folks just aren't gettin it!!

you weak whore!! you're crying for help already??

what a tool!

nate, teach him how to float wrenches.

from: http://www.deoxy.org/critmass.htm

"The number of enlightened people needed to set off the spiritual liberation of humanity has been bandied about by some of this century's visionaries as between 5 to 200 buddhatomic Christs."

I figure this is as good a place as any to find a few enlightend ones

<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Edited 1 times, lastly by tamatthews on Jul 11, 2001 ---</FONT></center>

to liberate, set free, desire freedom and it is yours, chains do not entrap you your thinking does......


freedom is just another word for nothing left to,,,

You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it. (gkc)

----Confused Gnus and Views-----
"all the gnus that gives people fits"

President Bush today declared that he plans to grant legal status to as many as 3 million illegal Mexicans living in the United States.
Bush explained his new "Mi casa es su casa" policy by saying " It will no longer be illegal to be Mexican. I love all things Mexican, in fact, I used to smoke alot of Mexican in my school days. And further, to protect their jobs, and to comply with my new policy, I have instructed the Border Patrol to adopt a "don't ask/don't tell" policy towards anyone crossing the border".

<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Edited 1 times, lastly by Larry on Jul 16, 2001 ---</FONT></center>

----Confused Gnus and Views-----
***all the gnus that gives people fits***

"There goes the neighborhood!"

Ex- president Bill Clinton today was greeted by well wishers, and not so well wishers, as he moved into his new offices on 125th street in Harlem.While many community people and leaders welcomed the former president,and saw his presence as a new source of revitalization for the area, the leader of the new Black Panther party voiced concern that this would increase property values in the area.While we understand how a major net plus like this may also increase rents over time and force some people out of living where they are,we find it smacks of self serving racism to deny positive progress to take place. Extremist factions today account for failures in civilty all over the globe, from right here at home, to the middle east and beyond.

( I was kinda looking for some funny smart ass stuff to say about this, but I couldn't)

----Confused Gnus and Views----
****all the gnus that gives people fits"****
-*-*-* Special Science Edition*-*-*-

Scientists announced today that virtually all forms of life on earth share common DNA to a much larger extent that previously thought.The researchers explained that human beings are more closely related to even single cell life forms and bacteria than had ever been suggested in previous studies. Using brain cells unwittingly expelled by President Bush during a flatulence attack, the researchers also discovered that some forms of human life are even closely related to forms of fungus and the dung beetle. After hearing the report, and learning of the scientific use of his unwittingly donated brain cells, Bush commented by saying " I guess I'd better cut down on the Texas chili".

<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Edited 2 times, lastly by Larry on Aug 01, 2001 ---</FONT></center>